Wednesday, June 2, 2010

The Day I Found Out.... November 19, 2007

I was inspired to right my story of the day I found out I was pregnant after reading Alisha's story on the Tarr Pitt Blog. Check her out she has some good stuff and stories.

It was a Sunday afternoon and my period was always on time to the date. I didn't think for one moment that I was pregnant, I thought it was the stress of life, work and school. We were spending the day with Ian's parents and were about to head to breakfast. I thought why the heck not to rule it out, I had no thought in my mind that I was pregnant, but I took a test just in case. I sat there in the bathroom after I peed on that silly stick just thinking holy crap what if I was PREGNANT! I waited and waited. It felt as if it was hours before it finally started  to reveal the results. I looked at it and was OMG I can't tell. It was hard to tell if it was a plus or a minus, so I let it go and headed out to breakfast. We eat breakfast and I come back and say well I better take one more just be sure. I took another test that actually says Pregnant and Not Pregnant, Just to be sure! So, I waited and waited and it finally showed up PREGNANT!

 I was in such shock that I didn't believe it. I came downstairs and gave Ian a look and he knew. I didn't have to say anything and he already knew I was pregnant. I kept thinking to myself.... I don't want to make that phone call and tell my dad. It didn't seem real and I wasn't even sure still if I was 100% Pregnant. Ian and I were in such shock that we got in the car and went for a drive. I then started to freak out and cry a little. We get back to Ian's parents house and as we were eating dinner Ian just came out and said, "Welp you are going to be grandparents again!" Ian's dad dropped his fork for his mouth with food on it and hit his plate. It was super overwhelming and I still didn't really have any emotions towards it.

I couldn't get the courage up, so I called my mom first. I just said Mum you are going to be a Grandma. She took it pretty well and was excited. I then called My Grandma (MorMor) and told her. Then it was time to call my Dad. I didn't really have any emotions until I called my dad and then that's when it hit me and I started crying on the phone with my dad. Instead of crying or happiness, and excitement, I felt ashamed. I felt like I let my Dad down. It was a very weird feeling. I was 20 years old in the middle of my bachelors degree and here I am pregnant. On the bright side I had and still have a very good job, so in all we were ok financially to have a child.

On Monday I called the doctor to set up an appointment to confirm that the two tests were accurate. It didn't really hit me until I was in the doctor's office that I was pregnant and saw the flicker on the screen. I pretty much broke down again and cried.

The next day I told my friend at work Kelli that I was pregnant and then not long after everyone knew that I was pregnant. It was hard, I was only 20 years old and felt as if I cheated myself out of my life and my future. It took me a long time to get to the point to where I accepted it and I was excited.

Now, we have Mackenna Jane Wright. She was born July 25th, 2008 at 4:33am.

 She was a large one weighing in at 9lbs even and 22 1/2 inches tall. I L.O.V.E being a mom and I love her more than anything. We  all have are regrets, but I don't regret her one bit. She brings light to my life. When you are down and out, tired, depressed she lift's me up just with her life and her smile.

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