Child Hood Vs. Adult Hood

I literally thought of this idea to blog about when I was driving home from the store this last Saturday night. I tend to think a lot, too much, about stupid stuff, dwell, stress..etc. I think you get it right! 

Once a upon a time I live in Seattle, Washington. I was born to an OCD father and mother. I didn't find this out until I grew older. 

I lived with my dad full time. My dad was a complete clean freak, and almost to the point where he would drive one crazy. He also was not a morning person whatsoever, and disagree to agree. 

Our rooms had to be clean and spotless. The old argument of "well it's my room I will close the door", didn't fly with my dad, cuz you see the sq footage of our closed door still belonged to him. So, our rooms were pretty clean for the most part. 

Dishes in the sink. We would have to have a pretty good reason why there were dishes in the sink. I.e. the dish washer was either currently running or you were about to say I'm emptying the dish washer now.

If you were late for school or missed the bus. I would A. call someone else and try and get a ride. or B. walk to school and just be late. It was much better to be late for school then wake my dad up and get oscar the grouch on the way to school in the car. Usually he was not happy when he was awoken from his slumber cave to drive me to school if I was late. 

There were times when my dad would tell me no. I couldn't do something I couldn't hang out with certain people, blah blah. The you cannot do list. Which I'm sure all of our parents have. I'm sure we have all thought to ourselves...

When I'm older and have my own place and my own house... I will

A. Buy whatever I want at the grocery store and will not have to answer to you

B. Stay out as long as I want and not have to check in with anyone. 

C. I will leave my room a mess because it will be my own house

D. I will do dishes whenever I feel like it so there. 

E. I will give my kids everything, because I know what it feel's like when someone tells you no.

F. I will not yell or discipline  my kids like you yelled & disciplined me. 

G. I will drive as fast and anywhere I want because I will be paying for my gas and my own insurance. 

This list could go on for like forever.

My point of all of this. When I grew older I became a product of my parents. Geee imagine that. 

I'm pretty clean and I don't like to leave my house or room a mess. I don't stay out late at all. My room can get a messy, but I usually clean it because it's just gross. I do dished if no daily every other day. I do not give my daughter everything, I say no and I don't feel bad about it. I have disciplined Mack for doing things wrong and not listening. I am cautious when driving because I don't want to have to pay money for tickets and higher insurance. 

It's funny when we are younger and think of all the things we cannot wait to do when we get older and live our lives without our parents. Everything I said I was going to do when I got older I don't do. It makes me laugh now about how rough I thought things were. The real world can be nasty and spit you out, but you parents raised and taught us certain things not to make them the bad guys, but teaching you to be realistic. 

I hope I can teach Mack the same things I was taught from my parents. 

Dear Bub Kristina,

I got this idea from a couple of blog's that have written letter's back to themselves when they were kids or teenagers. I thought this would be something really cool to do. So here it goes.

Dear Kristina, 

When you are 5 years old your mom is thinking of moving on and leaving your dad. She will pack up one morning and be gone. You will know this because your dad is laying in your bed crying saying mom isn't coming back. You will be sad but won't really understand what is going on. Don't worry your dad meets your stepmom Tina and she will love and take care of you like any mom would. She will teach you things like wearing pink lip stick and learning how to shift a manual. When you are 8 years old your mom will be moving back to New Zealand, this isn't because she doesn't love you, but drugs and alcohol will consume her life and she is doing it to get better and provide a better life for your brother. You are entering the 6th grade and your step mom Tina is moving on as well and moving out. She will have her own place that you can still go and visit and were told that she will always be part of your life. You will start junior high and get involved with new friends, but don't forget your old ones. Everyone is starting to date and have boyfriends and girlfriends, but that doesn't mean that you have to as well to be considered cool. Don't bug your dad about the latest new things, clothes. You don't need them. Even if people think you are uncool because of the clothes brands you wear it doesn't matter. Your mom comes back, do don't worry. She has returned and now she is part of your life again and brother. You will get really involved with soccer and love it. You owe your dad many thanks for paying for everything for you to enjoy the sport. When you start high school you will have all kinds of new temptations. Drinking, staying out late, and getting into trouble. Don't lie to your parents about where you are because you will get caught and they will find out. You get your license at 16 and you will even more tempted to get in trouble and lie. I wouldn't do it if you want to have your license taken away. Enjoy your new found freedom. Also, thank your dad for paying for your gas, sports, school, clothes, because without him you wouldn't have a car to drive freely in. You will experience your first love in high school and heart break. Don't waste your time with boys. You will have plenty of time. Even though you think you are cool and older, don't forget to spend time with family and tell your parents you love them and thank them for everything they have given you. You will experience hurt and sadness when you are told that your mom has brain cancer. But, please don't worry, 8 years later she will be just fine. You will graduate high school and move to another state. It will be tough and hard, but you can do it. You will make friends, find a good job and love. Don't forget to thank your aunt and uncle that put up with your ass. You will find love and dive right in. You will move in together, it will be scary and fun at the same time. You will have your ups and downs but overall he loves you and will take care of you. Right before your 21st birthday you will find out you are pregnant. Yes, you will have to call your family. You will call your mom first and rack up $20 bucks on your cell phone to call internationally.  You call your grandma since you will have the practice out before calling your dad. You will cry on the phone with your dad, but he will tell you that everything will be alright. The one thing that you won't know is that child will be joy and happiness to your life. Ian will be a good dad and you will be a good mother. Mackenna will be born and Ian will be laid not much later from work. Don't worry or stress he will find a job after a couple of weeks. He will find the best job and like it.  Your mom will surprise you and come all the way from New Zealand to meet Mackenna. It will be sad when she leaves but don't worry she will be back no more than a month later for good. Your mom will move to L.A. but that's ok, you and Mackenna will visit often. You will experience pain, hurt and sadness once again, when you learn your mom has cancer for the second time. Work will let you go down to L.A. and work remotely  so you can be with your mom. It's sad to leave to go home, but your mom will be back in a few months. You will be close again with your mom and brother. They will be part of your daily life and Mackenna's. Your future is up to you. Make wise choices and stick by your choices. You are what you make of your life, it's in your control. Enjoy it. 

I think we all wish we could have had a letter from the future to tell us what to expect, what not to do, etc.. but, that's just not life. We all have to experience and make decisions and wrong ones to learn and grow as individuals.